School holidays and Kids

Every year in the month of December, the child care center where the kids are attending will be closed for one week plus. Besides CNY, this last school term break is the longest break of the year. As both of us need to work, normally I will request parent's help on taking care the kids when the child care is closed. For the past 2 years, I have been sending the kids to the parents.

Due to the bad experience last year, this year I decided for those days that my mom is not available, I'm going to take leave to take care them myself. Initially we were thinking of going for a family trip. However we could not decide where we want to go, and another reason is I do not want any other family members to join our family trip. I just want solely four of us. So at the end nothing has been planned, and there is no trip for us.
Despite the fact that I'm not getting paid for taking leave (all my leave are unpaid as I am on consultant basis). But I think I rather get paid less than going through the mental stress for sending the kids to the parents house. My mom is fine. She will take good care of my kids without me need to worry anything. She will base on the situation and make her own judgement without bothering me during working hours. And she always willing to help (she understand about my work) and do some adjustment or rearrange her schedule if needed. So I would not hesitate to send the kids to her.

Lately me and my mom have some opportunities to spend the time together, just us and my gal. I think it was very long time ago since we got some time to have some good chat sessions, just both of us. I did not do it on purpose but I also did not hide when we talked about the other family members and I started whining to her what I'm not happy about. My mom has no issue taking care my kids for me while I'm at work. Both of the kids are not difficult to handle and they are used to the grandparents as well. But it never occur to me that my brother will question about how come the other family member is not helping on taking care the kids. While I don't need him to know why, I explained to my mom that it is just me that wish not want to trouble the other family member. I rather get less paid, than going through the mental stress dealing with other family member especially about the kids. I would not want to beg, I would not like to feel like I'm troubling them. Yes I know I am. I know they may want to do spring cleaning and stuff since it is year end. But please also understand that I'm not going for holiday, I need to work and the child care is closed. Nothing much that I can do about it unless I'm taking leave, which means besides making boss not happy, the income for the month also becoming much lesser. And I also feel annoyed or frustrated on getting phone call during working hours, on what time should give them milk, what time is their nap time, what time is their lunch etc. I understand that the main intention is to maintain the routine for the kids, but I also believe these things are adjustable. We are adult and we can make our own judgement and the kids are no longer a baby. While I feel thankful that in the past, sometimes with last minute notice we still could send the kids to the parent's house without me need to take EL. But also for the past 2 years, almost each time sending the kids over will give me such mental stress. And there is no improvement. I think I have enough stress especially stress from work to deal with and I certainly do not welcome more of it. So this year I decided to stop sending kids over and when if really can't avoid I would take EL which I did.

Last month, me and hubby needed to attend a seminar which we needed to leave the house very early to beat the trafficjam. For first time I left the boy sleeping with my mom and I'm glad that he did not give my mom any hard time at all. My mom said the boy is very easy. He would go to sleep as instructed. He also did not disturb others. So far I have left both kids stay overnight at my mom place twice. Maybe I will do the same on the week when my mom will help take care them then the child care is closed. As they will just go home sleep and go back there the next morning. My mom will take care the rest. I just need to pack enough clothes. So if they can stay overnight there I don't need to travel further to drop the kids in the morning on the way to work. Then I also can be more relax after work and have some private time for me and hubby. We can go catch a movie or so. The only one concern I have is, I notice the gal tends to be more naughty in my parents house. One thing is my parents does not handle them the same way we are. Of course we know them the best and we have our own way to make the kids listen to us. Another reason is they love playing with their cousin there. So they will just keep on playing and playing.

I just submitted my leave form this morning. Looking at the workload and task that I'm doing now it should be not an issue for me to take leave. Total the child care and kindy will close for 7 working days. My mom can help on 3 days and thus I'm taking 4 days off. Plan to take them out for a day and have not decided what to do with three other days. I think it is more worth it to spend some good time with the kids than dealing with the mental stress, and worrying making some people not happy.